24
May
11

Catering to Fiction


picture of delusions

Do we have a delusion for you!

I have been facing my life and the delusional state of mind I’ve had, but I’m afraid, I’ll just replace on set of artificial sensibilities with another.  My mind seems to cater to fiction.

I have been doing the same for over 20 years.  The work is real, but the way I work is really fictional.  Sufficient to say, I have realized of late that I need to professionalize parts of my work, to give myself more purpose.  The problem has been in part to the type of work and the type of work environment.

Working at a state educational institution, many people here living the delusion of quality education.  The faculty actually feel they are educating, but their secrets are not going unnoticed.  I see the type of term papers, and the cheating and the hiring of ghost writers that goes on.  Students are constantly getting around doing te real work, and learning the real topics, and are soliciting help on all fronts.  Their work is not their own.  Their work is a scam.

Further “scamminess” appears in the way of education matching job market.  I know that when these poorly educated students come back without jobs for over two years.  The degrees are worthless for many.  Not that every major and ever study is inconsequential — just most of the liberal arts, counseling, social work types who get a very poor schooling and then can’t work until they have advanced degrees.

But this piece is about me, right?  I live with a woman who is as productive as a rock.  She has her delusions, and I have mine.  She feels that as her husband I am to provide her with her spending money, her housing, food, clothing — just as if she were an infant.  She is like a leach, sucking off me — and me in my delusional state, let her suck and suck.  I have to act like it isn’t hurting, but damn, the pain has anesthetized me.

A few years ago, I thought to ride myself of her, to divorce her, and to start a new life.  My mind reeled.  I talk to other men who told me that they had similar feelings and did in fact get an attorney and cut the strings.  But they also told me of how crippled the experience left them financially.  One guy tells me he was unemployed for a while and then was so far back on his alimony and child support that they garnished anything he earned — and it continues to this day.  He is always looking for ways to earn money under the table — I really think he sells drugs.

So I persisted in the madness and do to this day.  The woman still can’t earn a dollar.  Hasn’t worked a full-time job for over twenty years.  Drives all over hell, spends money on her whims, and uses credit to patch her over expenditures — at least I have account protection.

But I have no protection from myself, and my love of the delusions with which I make up my life.

Advertisements

0 Responses to “Catering to Fiction”



  1. Leave a Comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Blog Stats

  • 233,141 hits

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 36 other followers

Follow Speaknstomp's Blog on WordPress.com

Top Posts & Pages

Recent Posts: Speaknstomp's Blog

Is History Funny?

We have all heard the expression “history repeats itself.” And so we also know that human beings have a tendency to forget harmful and even wicked events. We bury them. And once we bury the history, do we forget it? It struck me today that when Jerry Lewis died, people start talking about the film […]

Of Perfecting the Human Genome

Of Perfecting the Human Genome

What do we do when we’re all physically and mentally perfect? Congratulate ourselves on eradicating the need to help each other?  Shouldn’t everyone fend for themselves?  Is human society evolving or turning neanderthal? It’s always best to start a philosophical piece with questions. How perfect is the human race today?  We still have a world […]

Quesalupa Cheesy Breaking News

Quesalupa Cheesy Breaking News

Convenience Foods People are about convenience foods, and now it seems that fat cats who own the news marketplace are about serving up news that is just as cheesy. They also don’t want to have to do the research to know what is fact or fiction on the internet. Actually companies have cookie which track […]

The Trash Economy

In the trash economy, they even pay you for picking up trash. You get fully state benefits, medical, and retirement. All you have to do is vote! The state will give you all you need to live in one handy-dandy, little white-plastic shopping bag. It’s all about the taxes. Without a balanced approach, states are […]

America the oligarchy: Cheating for the rich

Ever since I was a kid, I hated the idea of cheating. I didn’t like cheating because cheating made competition null and void. When someone cheated, they were usually a bully type of person. I suspect that’s the same today. People who are really highly competitive, and love to grind down opponents tend to want […]


%d bloggers like this: